Thursday, June 26, 2008

NBA: Shaq Wants To Know How His Ass Tastes

He's talking to you, Kobe.

I bet it tastes like big, sweaty butt... just a hunch.

Monday, June 23, 2008


The boys over at BHGP were fooled into thinking that I actually knew something about Iowa Hawkeye sports.

So with that announcement, you will be able to read my posts over on BHGP from now on. Don't worry, though, I will still be posting here, as well.

I am now in the minor leagues. For shizzle.

My first post just went up, it's on the upcoming 2008 season for the basketball team.

Read. Enjoy.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

OT: If You Didn't Hear, Iowa is Flooded; Too Bad the DMR Isn't Under Water.

Iowa is in the middle of the single worst flood to hit the state since, well, ever... or somewhere around that time-period. Some waters are reaching beyond the 500 year flood plain. Just an all-out devastating flood last week. I am not going to put up all the links to the various sites that have photos or whatever, just for the fear of what happened to BHGP.

Hawkeye State put up a simple post showing some pictures of the flood, how you could donate to the cause, and put up an embedded video from the Des Moines Register's website. The video, mind you, had links to embed the video directly into your blog, message board, etc...

BHGP - Original Post

Well, apparently that set off a bitch alert down at the Rag, and BHGP was given a cease and desist order wherein they were ordered to remove the offending material. That material being the embedded video that the Rag provided links to allow to embed into your blog, message board, etc...

BHGP - DMR Sinks Disaster Relief

Deadspin caught wind of it, and all hell broke loose.

DEADSPIN - Odd Flood Relief Measures: The Des Moines Register Is Finally Understanding The Interweb

Well, whatever, a pretty shoddy-ass move by the Rag, even after the "apology" was sent. (Ir)regardless [sic], if you are reading this blog you are either an Iowa fan, an Iowa hater, or just bored out your mind (99% of the 2 readers of this blog... yes, that percentage is possible with 2 readers). However you got here, if you have a few bucks to spare, send it Iowa's way. The good people of Iowa need help.

University of Iowa - Flood Fund

Red Cross - Local

Red Cross - National

Ah, forget, I am going to live dangerously... here's a pic from last week in front of the Wig and Pen. Truly jaw-dropping.


Give Iowa a Helping Hand!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

OT: Wii Fit - Hula Hoop Girl

Thanks to Opie and Anthony for this little nuggent.

Borderline NSFW.

You have been warned.



Basically, another dbag guy who somehow has landed a hottie filmed his GF doing the Wii Fit game. We are all better people now because of it, though.

MEN'S BB: Exclusive Interview with Iowa Hawkeye Coach Todd Lickliter

Lickliterclappingshot.jpg picture by storminspank


STORMINSPANK: Coach Lickliter, thank you for agreeing to meet with me... even though I live in Minnesota and you are in Iowa and the fact that I actually didn't secure an interview of any form with you.

COACH LICKLITER: Thank you for conducting this fake interview.

SS: You're welcome.

CL: Thank you.

SS: Thank you. I mean, you're welcome. Er... thank you??

CL: (Pause)

SS: So last season went pretty well, huh?

CL: [long look, then puts head in his hands]

SS: Nah, I'm just messing with you. Last year really sucked. I mean, I tried to be optimistic throughout the season, but we were bad... like LA Clippers during the 80's and 90's bad. We even lost our own tournament we set up in order for us to win a preseason tournament. Shouldn't be a problem, though, because I saw you took it into your own hands that we'll never lose the Challenge again, as you got rid of it completely.

CL: Yeah, the Hawkeye Challenge had too much Hawkeye in it. However, I thought our team played through a lot of adversity. Tony's early injury, then Jarryd gets nicked for the season. All in all I thought our guys gave it their all. I'd still like to see them play a different style, a certain way if you will.

SS: What way would that be?

CL: The Butler Way.

SS: The what way?

CL: The Butler Way.

SS: Oooo Kaaaay. So you want Iowa Hawkeye basketball players to play as if they were playing for a completely different team?

CL: Precisely. If I can get everyone to play just like Butler does, we are going to go places. I can see it already. Anthony Tucker will be Mike Green. In fact, I have already told Anthony that he will be wearing #10. Devan Bawinkle gets to play A.J. Graves. Um, let's see, oh, Matt Gatens will be known as Pete Campbell. I have everyone picked out. It's going to be great.

SS: Well, one player you won't have on your team this year is Tony Freeman. Sounds like he sort of threw a little tamper tantrum on the way out of your meeting. I'm sure with your past record, you'll be more than willing to comment on what transpired in your office during his year end interview.

CL: Pusth.

SS: Pardon me?

CL: Pusth.

SS: Sorry, what did you just call me and why did you suddenly acquire a lisp?

CL: Pusth. That's the Butler Way. Passion. Unity. Servanthood. Thankfulness. Humility. Pusth.

SS: Oh. Right. Back to the Butler Way thing again. Good on ya.

CL: You see Tony wasn't big on pusth. I can't have guys on my team who don't love pusth. You gotta want the pusth. If you don't buy into the pusth, then you need to leave right now.

SS: Couldn't agree more.


SS: Hi Joel. Glad to hear from you. Now get back to recruiting.

JC: Will do. I'm just heading back to the great state of Indiana to look at some future Bulldo- I mean, Hawkeyes. Can't wait to get back there. Good ol' Indiana. What a magnificent state. Better swing by ol' Hinkle Fieldhou...

SS: Have fun, Joel. Coach Lickliter, of the six new players you are bringing in, who are you really excited to see in Black and Gold?

CL: What? Who am I excited to see in BLACK and GOLD??? Why would I be excited to see a Boilermaker suit up? I mean, at Butler, both Purdue and Indiana always got the better recruits and got all the spotlight. I don't think I am excited to see anyone suit up for Matt Painter and those stinkin' Boilermakers in their stupid Black and Gold uniforms.

SS: I was referring to Iowa.

CL: [Looks Up]

SS: The team you coach right now.

CL: Right, right. I was just testing you. Oh man, I gotta keep my cool here. I can't disgrace the likes of the revered sir Tony Hinkle. Gotta stay focused, Butler Way. Butler Way.


CL: Quiet, Chad.

CW: Sorry, boss. Well, off to Minnesota to go offer a bunch of obscure talents that no one has ever heard of. Woot! Woot!

CL: Go get 'em! And remember there is no "I" in Butler!!

SS: But there is an "I" in Iowa.

CL: Crap.

SS: Yeah.

CL: Hmmmmmm.... (cricket chirping)

SS: So when will it ever be The Iowa Way?

CL: (Laughing) Oh, for a second there, I thought you were asking a serious question. Oh man, good times! (Continues to laugh)

SS: J.R. Angle. He's seriously not going to suit up next year, right? I mean, have you followed his latest escapades?


SS: Ok, that's all I can stand, I'm going to have to end this fake interview. Thanks for the swag you brought me. I would have preferred some Hawkeye gear, but blue does happen to be one of my favorite colors.

Monday, June 09, 2008

MEN'S BB: Tragedy Strikes Hawkeye BB Family, Jake's Mom Has Died

KellyThoughts.gif picture by storminspank

Jake Kelly's mother, Julia, died this past weekend when the Cessna 206 she was riding in crashed into the Gulf of Mexico. Julia was 47 years old.

Read more HERE

Tampa Bay Online article HERE


Again, thoughts and prayers go out to the Kelly family.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

OT: If I Ever Get Fired, This is How I am Going Down

Holy crap. (Thanks to MissouriHawk for the lead.) - Watch more free videos

Damn, dude.

And yet another angle... looks to be a Russian office? Well, with the CRT monitors, it can't be in the US, can it? Don't taze me, bro!

Office Worker Meltdown Second Angle - Watch more free videos


Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Men's BB: Iowa Releases 2008 Non-Conference Basketball Schedule - Cupcakes Shudder With Fear

Well, the U of I has released the non-conference schedule for men's basketball.

Watch out for these guys:

Cupcakes.jpg picture by storminspank

Uhhhhhhhhhh Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

One thing is clear, Iowa isn't looking to get to "The Next Level" anymore... well, maybe not in regards to OOC RPI at least. What makes the schedule even more interesting is although the schedule hasn't brought in any world beaters, the cost of admission to the games will go up. Hmmm...

Here's a look at the newly released schedule:

Nov. 9 Wayne State University (exhibition)

Nov. 14 Charleston Southern University

Nov. 17 Texas-San Antonio

Nov. 20 at The Citadel

Nov. 23-25 Las Vegas Invitational (Iowa City)

Nov. 23 vs. Southeast Missouri

Nov. 25 Second round

Nov. 28-29 Las Vegas Invitaitonal (Las Vegas)

Dec. 2 at Boston College (Big Ten/ACC Challenge)

Dec. 6 Bryant University

Dec. 9 Northern Iowa

Dec. 12 Iowa State

Dec. 20 at Drake

Dec. 27 Western Illinois

If Iowa's OOC SOS is in the Top 150, I will be floored.

I actually had to Google "Bryant University". It's in Rhode Island. Their mascot is the Bulldogs. I was going to look to see what their RPI was on kenpom, but didn't have to because they are a DII school. This BEGS the question. Why is Bryant University, a DII school, on the non-conference schedule, yet Wayne State, another DII school, is an Exhibition game?

Interesting. Maybe I am missing something here.

Oh yeah, the Hawkeye Challenge is gone too. The tourney Lute started is no more.